The satirist is prevented by repulsion from gaining a better knowledge of the world he is attracted to yet he is forced by attraction to concern himself with the world that repels him.
See what you're meant to do when you have a mid-life crisis is buy a fast car aren't you? Well I've always had fast cars. It's not that. It's the fear that you're past your best. It's the fear that the stuff you've done in the past is your best work.